Remember this

 Dear Peanut,

I just accepted a new job at Kaiser. I worked very hard to become a doctor and am so proud to be an ObGyn. Every day I get to be a part of someone's life. Sometimes it is the best day of their life, and sometimes the worst. But either way, I love what I do. I guess you could say I've focused much of my energy on being a doctor up until this point. While I know I will always love my job and will continue to do it well, having you in my life does change things, and for the better. The reason I am changing my job, is so that I will have more flexibility and stability to be your mom. I have always been afraid of how to balance it all. I was so lucky to have incredible parents that were always there for me, and helped me through some incredibly challenging times. Your Dad is exactly the same. We both have big shoes to fill. 

I know there may be times in the future that I am not home when you go to bed, and I may miss a sporting or school event. For that, I am so sorry; you know I would always rather be with you. I think of a story my friend Liz told me. Her mom is also an ObGyn and there were times she was working instead of with Liz and her siblings. Liz remembers one night when her mom was on call and had to go in to the hospital. Liz was a teenager and her mom asked her if she wanted to go too. Liz went and was there in the OR as her mom did a C-section. Liz told me that she was always proud of her mom and understood her job, but it was not until that moment that she saw her mom in charge of an operative room, taking care of a patient and bringing life into the world; she gained a different perspective and appreciation. Liz is now an ObGyn as well. I say this not to sound self-important, or because I want you to be a doctor. I say it because I hope that despite missing out on occasion, you will learn from both your Dad and I a passion and pride for what you do, balance, and care of others. But most of all, I want you to know that you are always most important in my life and I will always do whatever I can to make our time together special. I love you. 

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